THE ASSUMPTION
Many years have passed since the birth of my Son’s Church on that remarkable day of Pentecost. During those early days of the infant Church, my heart was filled with joy, witnessing the number of converts to the faith grow day by day as many signs and wonders were done among the people by the hands of the apostles. And more than ever believers were added to the Lord, multitudes both of men and women, so that they even carried out the sick into the streets, and laid them on beds and pallets, that as Peter came by at least his shadow might fall on some of them. These and other such scenes reminded me of the days walking with my Son during his ministry here on earth; so much so, that I could vividly imagine my Son working his ministry from heaven directly through his chosen priests. It was especially gratifying to watch how the humble, faith-filled people accepted, obeyed, and revered Peter as my Son’s vicar, his prime minister in his visible absence.
The people also gathered from the towns around Jerusalem, bringing the sick and those afflicted with unclean spirits, and they were all healed. So the church throughout all Judea and Galilee and Samaria had peace and was built up; and walking in the fear of the Lord and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit it was multiplied. I praised God for I recognized the fulfillment of his promise when he said to Israel through the prophet Ezekiel: “For I will take you from the nations, and gather you from all the countries, and bring you into your own land. I will sprinkle clean water upon you, and you shall be clean from all your uncleannesses, and from all your idols I will cleanse you.” Indeed, with the eyes of faith, I saw the newly baptized walk as new creations in a renewed land. To the unbeliever, it was all folly; but for those who had faith in the power of the words of my Son uttered by his ordained ministers, forgiveness, freedom, and salvation were attained. And these graces were given freely by our loving God to those who possessed a trusting faith, without regard to works lest any man should boast.
Predictably, however, with the outpouring of these blessings upon the infant Church came the inevitable tension between the faithful and the Jewish ruling class. The religious hierarchy in Jerusalem sensed that their power was being threatened by the good news offered by my Son’s ministers. This sorely afflicted my heart, for I knew that the most learned among our kinsmen ought to be the first to be open to his message and to recognize that my Son’s teachings proclaimed by his appointed ministers were the very fulfillment of Yahweh’s promises to his people. Indeed, the gospel was a natural extension of the path to union with God laid down by him from the beginning of time. Unfortunately, the very ones entrusted to guide the children of Israel, God’s Old Covenant stewards, became prideful and arrogant and chose to veer off this holy path long ago. Rather than share God’s blessings in a spirit of service to his people, the ruling class selfishly hoarded his gifts, reaped the benefits for themselves, and twisted the law to oppress his children. In reality, they forged their own path of wealth and power, a road which ends in death.
As a result, I observed over time an increase in the persecutions against my Son’s followers, who began to call themselves Christians, and I watched them being hunted down like animals. But, even with each passing atrocity, I was not surprised by this oppressive environment. While on earth, Jesus challenged the arrogance of the priestly class and was murdered for his truth. As I suffered then with my Son during his passion, so I would continue to suffer with his Church, reliving the hateful crimes committed against my Son’s mystical body. In a futile attempt, the religious hierarchy tried to stop my Son’s mission by killing him, and when they saw that their actions were not successful, they pursued his followers. But this movement has not been thwarted; my Son’s Church has prevailed against all evil, and it will continue to grow, because it carries an irresistibly wonderful message for those who are humble and poor in spirit. Yet, for those in positions of power, who are haughty and boast in their own works, this news comes as a threat.
Even so, I knew my Son loved all these people and hoped to bring all men to himself. Therefore, my prayer has always included not only my own spiritual children but also those who persecuted them, indeed, all those who may someday become my own through the grace of God. And so, years ago, I began to pray in earnest for the conversion of one man in particular, a man named Saul. While I had never met him, I had heard that he was a Jew, born at Tarsus in Cilicia, but brought up in this city at the feet of Gamaliel, one of the most respected rabbis, and educated according to the strict manner of the law of our fathers. He was obviously a man of great intelligence and integrity and yet had recently become known for persecuting my Son’s Way to the death, binding and delivering to prison both men and women.
Like it was yesterday, I remember Mary Magdalene bursting through the door where I resided, the home of John’s relatives. Out of breath from running and in a hysterical state, she came to deliver the horrible news. Stephen, a man full of faith and of the Holy Spirit, whose brave witness to my Son had been responsible for increasing the number of disciples in Jerusalem, was being dragged out of the city to be stoned, because he spoke the truth in a stunning testimony before the rulers, elders, and scribes in council. In haste I followed her to the scene just beyond the city wall in time to witness Stephen, even as he received the incoming stones upon his body, pray to all who would listen, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” I offered my prayer in union with him as he knelt down and cried with a loud voice, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.”
I began to tremble. It was as if I was transported back in time to that fateful Friday when Jesus was crucified. Mary Magdalene collapsed in my arms and buried her head in my chest. I wondered, “How much more suffering must I witness and endure?” And then I answered my own question, “As much as my Lord requires of me.” My heart was again pierced through, but it did not discourage me from holding onto the hope that, through the blood of such martyrs, who were filled with the Holy Spirit, the Church would grow and receive unimaginable blessings.
As soon as the crazed men turned their backs on this martyred Christian to leave his corpse for the birds to consume, I rushed to Stephen’s body and cradled him in my arms, as I did Jesus after his death. Gazing upon his battered body, I cried, “He is the image of my Son!” I looked up to survey those responsible for this travesty and tried to imagine the infinite love Jesus has for all men, even for those who condoned and committed this horrid crime. I cringed as I watched those who were guilty of this atrocious act lay down their garments at the feet of a young man. Then my beloved John, who had followed us to this dreadful site, drew near to me, leaned down and whispered, “The man accepting the garments as a sign of his instigation of this act of murder is named Saul.” The pain in my heart intensified while I reminded myself that I am the mother of my Son’s Church where we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. Therefore, I assured myself that I had reason to hope that someday, through the prayer of a mother’s suffering heart, together with the dying prayer of this martyr in my arms, Saul could also be my dear child who could turn the hearts of many toward the Savior he might one day know.
Over the course of many months, with patience and a steadfast heart, I continued my intercessory prayer for Saul, even as the horrific reports continued of how he had laid waste the church, and entering house after house, he dragged off men and women and committed them to prison. Despite all the heinousness that occurred at the instigation of this man, I still clung to the hope that there was good in him and that he acted wrongly only out of a great passion for his countrymen and a sincere, though dreadfully misplaced, love for his God. I was convinced that he just did not know that those he persecuted were part of the mystical body of the Lord and God that he worshipped. Perhaps he could be enlightened one day and then through his knowledge and influence reach the hearts of the Jews who had been unwilling so far even to consider the message offered by the apostles, who were viewed as mere Galilean fishermen. While the twelve, with the outpouring of the Spirit, had been highly successful with so many people, they could not impress or penetrate the majority of the Jewish ruling class whose grip on the average person was tight. Once again, arrogance seemed to drive a wedge between God and the people he loved so much.
“If it be your will,” I prayed to my Son with the full assurance that he hears me and knows my heart, “convert Saul so that his talent might be utilized to move the Jews to listen to your saving message. And if it be that he does not reach them directly, perhaps then indirectly by sending him as a powerful preacher to the Gentiles.” I figured that if the Jews witnessed the blessings coming upon the nations at the hands of a learned scholar of the law such as Saul, they might at least be stirred to jealousy watching the Gentiles being offered the free gift of salvation through faith in my Son. Indeed, through the power and intervention of Jesus, I knew that this man, Saul, could see the light and become a man not unlike Moses who would be willing to blot himself from the book of life for the sake of his kinsmen. It could happen . . .
I laugh out loud at my recollection of years gone by and at the generosity of my loving God as I feverishly work on completing a new set of priestly garments for the apostles—including one for my son Saul who, sometime after his conversion as a result of Jesus’ direct divine intervention, took the name Paul. Now, because of the fabulous grace that our Savior bestowed on him, he has become an outstanding witness of the faith to the Gentiles. Sadly, however, the majority of the Jewish people have yet to turn from the hardness of their hearts. Paul is now the one who is being chased from town to town, at times being stoned and barely escaping with his life. But still, I maintain the hope and faith that the Jewish people will someday come to know their Messiah, the one they have for so long awaited. It will be in God’s time. It will happen according to his holy will.
My thoughts are interrupted by John who enters the common room of the home where I am sewing. He approaches me and says, “Mother, you know that all the apostles are returning to Jerusalem to convene a council. For the sake of the Church we need to definitively settle this circumcision issue.” I nod to let him know that I understand. John has been telling me of this growing division within the Church where some Jewish believers are insisting that circumcision be forced upon all the newly-converted Gentiles.
In my heart I believe this position is wrong since my Son came to free us from these outdated works of the law that were imposed only after God’s people broke covenant, to serve as reminders of the sins committed. But now, with the sacrifice of my Son, he has freed us from all sin. As a result of the institution of his powerful sacraments, all Christians have the indwelling of the Holy Spirit which leads to holiness. My Son’s sacraments serve as reminders of his righteousness, which has been revealed to all who believe in him regardless of circumcision and the other prescriptions of the law. Why would we want to go back to the Old Covenant works when we have something infinitely better in the New Covenant established through the blood of my Son? Nevertheless, as a result of man’s fallen nature, confusion has weaved its way into the Church, and I reassure myself that when this happens, as it surely will in the future with other doctrinal problems, Jesus will guide his chosen ministers, through the power of the Holy Spirit, and bring them together to convene in order to resolve any such issues that might afflict the Body of Christ.
John continues, “There are some who would like to meet with you during their stay here in Jerusalem.” As he says this, two men appear in the doorway of the house.
“Of course,” I slowly and softly reply with a note of apprehension in my voice. As the first of the two men approaches, I immediately recognize him as Paul. My heart races with a combination of nervousness and gratitude as I am finally confronted with the man for whom I had interceded with my Son in prayer for so long.
He falls to his knees before me and places his head close to my feet. He pleads, “Forgive me, mother of my Savior, and now, my mother. I have committed grave sins against your Son and his Church, and, therefore, against you and all your children who are, in fact, my brothers and sisters.”
I bend down to lift his head; I look him in the eyes and respond, “I have waited a long time to meet you, Paul of Tarsus, for you have been in my prayers even before the first day I saw you. I had great hope that you would be a stellar disciple of my Son. Come, sit beside me.”
And then I am introduced to the young man who is standing in Paul’s shadow. His name is Luke, and he is the personal secretary of Paul. Both men take a seat as John hovers at a close distance. I briefly smile at John, though I know he has no idea why; at this very moment he reminds me of my dear Joseph, as he assumes his role as protector over me.
Once my guests are comfortable, Paul continues, “Please know that I had no idea whom I was persecuting when I approved and committed those atrocious crimes against my now fellow Christians. Yet, I know that, through the grace of God, I along with all my brethren who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death and buried with him, so that as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.
“Still, I know there is much for which I need to atone. For though I am free from all men, I have made myself a slave to all, that I might win the more. To the Jews I became as a Jew, in order to win Jews; to those under the law I became as one under the law—though not being myself under the law—that I might win those under the law. To those outside the law I became as one outside the law—not being without law toward God but under the law of Christ—that I might win those outside the law. To the weak I became weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all men, that I might by all means save some. I do it all for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings. I do it for your Son, for the sake of his name and for his mystical body, the Church. I do not run aimlessly, I do not box as one beating the air; but I pommel my body and subdue it, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.”
Oh my. Words fail me listening to the zeal expressed by this soldier for Christ. I smile as I think to myself, “My confidence in the ability of this man to convey the message of my Son has certainly not been misplaced.”
Sensing the mature wisdom and scholarly insight of this servant before me, my thoughts instantly return to my earlier conversation with John concerning the circumcision controversy in the Church. I am seized with a desire to take advantage of this opportunity to speak about it to Paul. Ever since John mentioned that all the apostles were convening in Jerusalem to discuss the issue of circumcision, my mind has been haunted with the memory of the day Joseph and I took the infant Jesus to be circumcised in order to fulfill the law. My heart grieved then and continues to do so as I often replay the memory. I never desired any harm to come to my dear Jesus. And I certainly did not wish for his body to be mutilated in such a way. The image of the panicked look in his face as he was taken from my arms is one that has never left my mind. He was only eight days old. But still he knew me. He and I would gaze lovingly into each other’s eyes for hours until finally his lids would slowly become overwhelmed by the heaviness of fatigue, causing him, who is my God and the Creator of all, to succumb to the weaknesses of his own created body and drift off to sleep.
But, on that fateful day, it was as if he sensed the moment he was taken from me that something was not right and that pain was in his immediate future. I will never forget the way his eyes pleaded with mine not to allow him to be torn from my embrace, to rescue him from this impending fate and to cuddle him once again, safely beneath my mantle. The sound of his heart-wrenching wail tortured me then. I can still hear it in my mind. When he was finally placed back in my arms after the procedure, his panic screams lingered, and I wept along with him as I tried to soothe him against my heart. His eyes finally found mine as I repeated over and over again, “I am so sorry, my sweet Jesus!” Only then did he begin to calm. That day was one of the deepest sorrows of my life, a day that ignited a string of sufferings that climaxed in Jesus’ passion.
Joseph had struggled to comfort me by reminding me that it was necessary to fulfill the law and to recognize that the time had fully come, that God sent forth his Son, born through me, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons . . . thus enabling us to cry out from our hearts, “Abba! Father!” Then, through the power of God, we would no longer be slaves but children, and if children then heirs.
With all my heart, I am certain that, through my Son’s sacrifice, we have been set free from all these works of the law. Requiring circumcision, the very act which places a man under the law, would once again shackle and enslave God’s people with burdens that they could not bear. Circumcision never made anyone holy. Sacrificing animals never made anyone holy. It is obedience to the moral law of God, made possible by the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, that makes us holy. This law is found in nature, contained in the Ten Commandments revealed to Moses, and summed up succinctly by my Son, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
And so, consumed with these thoughts, I seize upon a break in our conversation and begin to share with Paul my opinion on the circumcision debate. I am barely able to get a sentence out on the subject before Paul nods reassuringly and replies, “Have no fear, my Lady. I have been trying to convince my fellow Jews, for some time now, that it is foolhardy to place their faith in a sign such as circumcision which serves no purpose other than to place a man under and into the entire economy of the Jewish law, with its hundreds of restrictions, requirements, and other such works. Instead they should abandon themselves to Jesus and safeguard their faith in him who embodies God’s law perfectly, for in him the righteousness of God has been manifested apart from law, including, and perhaps especially, circumcision. And since all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, both Jew and Gentile, we can only be justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption which is in Christ Jesus, whom God put forward as an expiation by his blood, to be received by faith. I plan to tell all those at the council to remember that God promised Abraham that he would have countless descendants and that he would be the father of many nations years before he was ever commanded to be circumcised and certainly centuries before the Mosaic Law was given to the people of Israel; consequently, the promise to Abraham and his descendants, that they should inherit the world, did not come through the law but through the righteousness of faith. Therefore, if, in fact, it is only the adherents of the law who are to be the heirs, faith is null and the promise is void.”
I can tell that Paul is hoping that I am following his logic, and, to assure him that I am, I interject, “Because the promise made to Abraham was not tied to the law in general, nor to circumcision in particular, but rather to the Patriarch’s faith.”
“Precisely!” Paul responds with excitement. “The Jews boast of being natural descendants of Abraham but forget that Abraham’s natural abilities working apart from God were only capable of fathering a son into slavery through the Egyptian servant, Hagar. And it was only after this faithless act of becoming one with Hagar, and through her all the paganism of Egypt, that Abraham and all his descendants were given the command of circumcision.
“If my Jewish brothers were to prayerfully revisit the story of Abraham, they would realize that God’s gift of Isaac was the product of divine intervention and given as a result of Abraham’s trust in him. Therefore, it is Abraham’s spiritual fatherhood that we are to affirm because it was not his natural abilities united to Sarah’s that produced Isaac; rather it was his faith united to Sarah’s that brought life, through God’s divine intervention, to their natural union. This is how we became children of the promise. It was the result of supernatural grace through a mother who was Abraham’s wife and therefore a free woman, not through a mother like Hagar who was a slave of this world.
“Now, allegorically speaking, we can view Hagar as representing the Old Covenant from Mount Sinai and recognize that she corresponds to the present Jerusalem, for she is in slavery with her children. But the Jerusalem above is free, and she is our mother . . . which was only prefigured by Sarah, but is now fulfilled in you, Mary, who are the mother of the true promised one, our Savior. And now, by grace, you are my mother.” Paul places his hand on top of mine and humbly bows his head.
After a moment he stands and positions himself before John, Luke, and me to conclude his argument as if he is rehearsing before the general council of bishops. “Now we, brethren, like Isaac, are children of promise. But as at that time he who was born according to the flesh persecuted him who was born according to the Spirit, so it is now.” And then Paul adds with a rhetorical flourish, “But what does the scripture say? ‘Cast out the slave and her son; for the son of the slave shall not inherit with the son of the free woman.’ So, brethren, we are not children of the slave but of the free woman.” Paul then approaches me, kneels before me, looks me in the eyes, and adds with even more passion and determination, “Now that we have been set free by your Son, we will not go back to the status of slaves to sin. You have my word. We will no longer be branded with the sign of enslavement that is circumcision.”
With a joyful heart I reply, “Thank you, my dear son, Paul. I am so grateful for your witness to my Son’s truth. You are indeed gifted with a tremendous amount of understanding.” After such a display all are quiet as if they are attempting to digest a scholarly dissertation.
Slowly I turn toward my second guest and indicate that I would like to know more about him, the young man who has yet to utter a word. But Paul quickly answers on his behalf, before Luke has an opportunity, and provides me with his companion’s profile. As soon as I hear that Luke is a Gentile convert to the faith, I cannot help but think with a smile that he must be particularly grateful to hear Paul’s strong stance on the issue of circumcision. I am also told that Luke is a trained physician who has recently begun to accompany Paul on his journeys. I sense that he is a mild-mannered individual, who possesses a great deal of humility.
Then Paul asks, “Would it be all right if he spends some time with you, to transcribe your account of the early years with your Son? I can only imagine that your life with Jesus, our Lord and Savior, was intertwined with a great many mysteries. No doubt most are too private and sacred to make public. However, Luke intends to write an account of Jesus’ ministry to be preserved as a sacred oracle, and I am confident that anything you might feel comfortable sharing will greatly enrich his gospel account.”
I give them both my approval. Then Luke takes a small step toward me and with a most humble demeanor asks, “My fair Lady, it is true that I am a physician, as well as Paul’s scribe, but unknown to many of my brothers, I am also an artist. And I hope it is not too bold of me to ask . . . would you be so kind as to allow me to paint your portrait?”
I am taken aback. “Who would want to have a portrait of me?” I wonder.
But he seems so sincere, and before I can even answer he continues, “He must have looked so much . . .”
“Like you!” both Paul and Luke say together with wide grins.
This sweet moment causes me to choke back tears as it reminds me of how much I miss the physical presence of my dear Jesus. I clear my throat, give a slight chuckle, and respond, “Of course, I would be delighted to sit while you paint my portrait and also to help with your account of Jesus’ life. It would be my honor.”
“Truly the honor will be mine, I assure you,” Luke replies.
And then he looks as if he has more to say but is obviously hesitating out of either embarrassment or perhaps humility, I cannot tell. But I think to myself, “If I am going to reveal personal details of my life with Jesus, mysteries that I have pondered for years, to this man, he needs to feel comfortable in my presence.” So I ask forthrightly, “What is it my son? I can tell there is more on your mind.”
Luke still hesitates, then after a moment he begins rather awkwardly, “Your appearance, my Lady, is, well, remarkable for a woman your age, not to mention for a woman who has endured the great sufferings that you have undergone. It is as if you have not aged since young adulthood.” He abruptly stops and steps backward realizing that his words are not proper for a young man to use in such company. I note the stern look of contemptuous disbelief that Paul is giving his companion. Luke feels foolish and embarrassed. But this is not how I wish him to feel, for I sense he has a good heart. After all, he is a doctor and an artist; one would naturally expect such professionals to observe these things.
At this, John intervenes and indicates to these men that their stay has reached an end for the day. As they prepare to leave, I thank them for coming and let Luke know that he is welcome to return to proceed with an interview and to bring his drawing materials. They both bow to me and leave before I can fully assure Luke that he need not feel ashamed for his comments. I watch as they exit the house, but before they are out of my sight, I notice Paul in the threshold reprimanding his associate. With a smirk, I dismiss it and hope that I will be able to establish a wonderful working relationship with Luke.
This brief exchange with Luke reminds me of a conversation I had with Mary Magdalene just a few days before. I confided in her that I felt certain that Jesus would be coming for me soon. She expressed at the time that she could not believe that I am anywhere near death. “Mother,” she reasoned, “you have not aged a bit! You do not have any indications of an elderly woman, for your skin is not sagging or wrinkled and your back is not hunched. You look as young as the day I met you!” I must admit that I could not help but smile at the compliments she bestowed on me because I recognized that her words are those that every woman likes to hear; they confirm the gift of beauty bestowed on woman by her creator to reflect the inner beauty of her soul which God designed to reveal the love of the Holy Spirit. And yet, her observations caused me to ponder another truth. Those subjected to this world do age and appear to be weighed down by the earth’s pull, as if to highlight the fact that, because of the original sin of Adam, men shall return to the dust from which they were made. And in many ways this truth is actualized as an icon in the elderly.
After a moment of deep reflection, I answered my dear daughter, “It is not because I feel old that I think that Jesus will soon come for me. On the contrary, it is because I feel more elevated, more drawn to him with each passing day, as if heaven, not earth, is pulling me closer and closer to itself.” Mary looked a bit wistful. So I sat beside her, placed my arm about her shoulder, and said, “Don’t be sad. Be happy, always be happy. I will never stop loving and taking care of you, whether or not you can physically see me. I will forever be with you as if I am in another room; out of sight, but very, very near! Most importantly, in my glorified state, I can bring you closer to Jesus than I could ever have done here on earth; because, once I am in the heavenly kingdom, I will not be restrained by the limitations of this earth. Hold on to the faith that is yours, Mary, and by which you can have absolute certainty of this.” I smiled, gave her a motherly hug, and added, “Jesus will come for you, too, very soon. But for now, use your time well. Time is a gift from God to be stewarded wisely. Utilize it to become closer to him and to bring others to him for the building of my Son’s kingdom, for that is his will. He longs for all mankind to one day be part of his kingdom. His love is boundless!”
There were tears in her eyes, but there need not have been. All believers must know that I am their mother, even those who will never see me on earth but through faith will learn how much I love them and will allow me to mother them and bring them closer day by day to my Son and his heavenly kingdom. I am certain that my ability to intercede for my children will be immeasurably greater once I am with Jesus, seated at his right hand.
* * *
Weeks have passed since my first meeting with Paul and Luke. I have spent a great deal of time with Luke; he has finished his portrait, but more importantly, he has completed his interview of me. It is imperative that all know the circumstances surrounding my Son’s incarnation and how he desired to be born under the law so he could free his own Jewish people who are under the law, as well as the Gentiles who are not. I am sure that Luke’s account will be an inspiration for all generations. As important as it is for people to understand that Jesus is the Son of God, it is every bit as critical for them to realize that he is also my Son, fully human in every way, beginning from the moment he was conceived in my womb to the moment of his death on the cross, and now beyond into eternal glory. He is our God, as well as our brother, who came so that we all may have life. The truth that he is both human and divine is the basis of our faith and our very salvation. He is the only mediator between God and man because he is the only person that is both God and man. The unity he embodies of the divine and the human proves the infinite love God has for all men—that he should deign to be one of us!
The fact that this union is the product of the love shared by my God and me, when the Spirit overshadowed me that morning of the angel’s visit so many years ago, is still a mystery that never ceases to amaze me. And now, this unity of love is extended to every newborn Christian at baptism, for it is then that the Holy Spirit actually abides in and fills each Christian, making each a holy tabernacle. These are the thoughts that preoccupy my waking hours, especially at night, when the distractions of the day cease, when I recline for sleep and my heart is allowed to rest solely in my Lord.
Every night when I close my eyes, I hope to see Jesus calling me. But every morning when I wake up, I realize that I have one more day to do his will here on earth, which I know is also a privilege. As anxious as I am to be reunited completely with my Son and with my Spouse, my God, I am also grateful to fulfill my role as mother to my Son’s ministers here on earth. I find it increasingly satisfying to see that they have grown to know more deeply the Holy Spirit within them. In turn, they possess the confidence that I will protect them, even from a distance, with my intercessory prayer. They have experienced the power of faith and have come to realize that through the action of the Holy Spirit they can actually do my Son’s will and minister on his behalf more effectively now than at any time during the three years Jesus was with them walking the earth. They have grown up! And I am their proud mother. This band of apostles has successfully completed its first council and is developing and defining doctrine to build up and encourage the Church. They are appointing more priests to minister to the growing number of believers. Soon they will scatter to the four corners of the earth to proclaim the good news of salvation offered by my Son, and I feel that my motherly intercession will be most effective when I assume my role as his queen mother in his heavenly kingdom.
This is what I ponder as I sit after supper with the apostles the night before they plan to depart from Jerusalem. Their business here has been completed. Tomorrow they will travel in separate directions throughout the world. The atmosphere is subdued for the future is uncertain, and we all suspect that we will never again be gathered in one room. Peter rises as the evening draws to a close, and he motions to his brethren. He kneels before me and asks for my maternal blessing. The others follow suit. I assure them that, although they will be separated by great distances, they can always rely on my motherly intercession no matter where their ministries take them. Even more importantly, they know that, through the festal gathering of the new paschal feast, they will always be united as one in the body of Christ, the family of God. I utter what I am sure will be my last words to my Son’s priests, “Stay close to Jesus in the Holy Eucharist. He is truly present in the sacred manna which will sustain you on the journey to eternal life where we will all meet again.”
“United as one in the body of Christ,” I say to myself later on in the evening as I retire for sleep. That was Jesus’ desire and prayer at the Last Supper, and it has been fulfilled in the celebration of my Son’s sacrifice. It is so exciting to think that we are finally living in a day when the prophet Malachi’s words are beginning to be realized: “For from the rising of the sun to its setting my name is great among the nations, and in every place incense is offered to my name, and a pure offering; for my name is great among the nations, says the LORD of hosts.” Indeed, my Son’s sacrifice will someday be offered continuously on the altars all around the world, the one true, perfect sacrifice, where all the saints in heaven join together with the faithful pilgrims on earth in celebrating this pure offering to the Father. This prophecy is a reminder that we are not merely individuals praying to and worshipping our God, but we are individuals who are members of a family, living stones as Peter once described it, within the family of God. Yes, we are living stones piled together making a huge structure with Jesus as our cornerstone. “What a beautiful family prayer this pure offering is,” I whisper out loud as my drowsy body wins over my mind.
I close my eyes. Suddenly, the sound of angels singing floods my being. “Hail, full of grace, the Lord is with you! Blessed are you among women, and through you, all women blessed.”
I answer in prayer, “I am your handmaid; take me, I am yours.” I release all that binds me to this earth and inhale my last breath, as one does before diving into a pool of water. I can feel my body being drawn into full union with my Lord, my God, as he professes his love to me.
I can hear my Son’s words reverberating through me, “Your humanity enabled me to become a man. In your womb we were bonded; we breathed, were nourished, and moved together. I lived and grew off of every movement of your body, exchanging fluids and even tiny living particles. Come, my mother, my masterpiece, live in me, the Temple, where we are one, living and moving together for all eternity.” Those particles that Jesus allowed me to see, floating around in my body the morning of his resurrection, are again illuminated, moving feverishly about and lifting me toward my Lord with a forceful attraction. My being is flooded with his powerful love. I sense that his flesh has transformed my flesh, that he is in me, consuming me, filling me with his life, as I enter ever more deeply into his divine nature. How can this be? Like a newborn in the arms of her loving family my comprehension is limited, but still I know the unconditional love that penetrates me and I respond with sighs too deep for words. The power within those glowing particles begins to pulse through the rest of me until I feel that every fiber of my being is shot through with the love that is transfiguring me. More than ever I am aware of him dwelling within me, and I am responding to his presence in perfect harmony.
I feel more alive than ever as I dare myself to fully open my eyes, for I fear that what I am experiencing might only be another dream, as I have dreamt of this moment all my life. But it is not a dream. All of my senses are perfectly uninhibited and working in a way that never seemed possible while on earth. Now, with my eyes wide open, I once again behold my dear Jesus, and he appears as he did after his resurrection in his perfectly glorified body. I am cloaked with the pure spirit of my God, as I stand face to face with my dear Father who gave me life as his precious daughter. I know each of them with an intimacy only spouses in the midst of ecstasy can attempt to articulate. Indeed, what I am experiencing, what I am feeling, is humanly indescribable.
And then, in them and with them and through them, I am able to see my dear Joseph and all my loved ones, though their bodies do not seem quite complete or solid, as if they are still awaiting an event. This awareness causes me to look down at myself and wonder, “How do I look? Am I also fading in and out as a body partially camouflaged by smoke?”
“You are magnificently glorious,” is the answer I hear from my sweet Joseph. “Indeed, you are my beautiful queen, perfectly reflecting the glory of my God and Savior!”
Jesus steps in to explain, “Their bodies will be glorified at the general resurrection at the end of time. You, however, are different. You were prepared for me from all eternity to give me human life through the flesh of your body. The body I offered on the cross and now forever before the Father is one that came from you. It was only a matter of time before I drew you to myself. My love has assumed you, the perfection of your body and your pure soul, to me. Preserved from any mark or stain from the moment of your conception, you alone always said ‘yes’ to the action of the Holy Spirit who has made all of this happen.” Jesus sweeps his arms about displaying the splendor of his kingdom which I can tell will take an eternity to explore. I follow the action of his arms with my eyes and see a multitude of angels and souls assuming positions of homage before me and hear the unending chorus of amens. He then continues, “Your glorified body gives all mankind the hope that death will not permanently separate the body from the soul. All saved persons will become whole through the merits of the sacrifice of my body.” Then he faces me, fixes his piercing eyes on mine, and adds with his warm smile, “. . . which came from you.” Being able once again to look into his penetrating eyes is perhaps one of the greatest rewards of this glory! Jesus and I embrace. With my head resting against his chest, I can feel the warmth of his body and hear the sound of his beating heart. I never want to move, and I realize that I never have to.
Hovering at my side is the majestic angel who visited me so many years ago. Though he has no visible body, he is still somehow presented before me with a constantly changing swirl of beautiful light and color. This heavenly surrounding seems to be a more natural environment for him than earth was when he visited me so long ago. “Gabriel is his name,” I hear Joseph whisper to me. Gabriel, in his unique angelic body, bows majestically before me. There are millions of these angels all about, intermingled with the crowds of redeemed souls. I want to rush and embrace each individual person for my heart is consumed with joy and love. And then I discern that my desire is fulfilled immediately, for in my state and where I am, there are no limitations on my physical body. My will which is one with my Lord’s is instantaneously accomplished here, in God’s home.
I briefly consider what the apostles must be thinking. Are they astounded to see me no longer among them, not even my physical body? Jesus again gives me a kind smile and says, “You will always have a mother’s heart.” He adds with a chuckle, “You will never stop thinking of and praying for your children. And, because of you, every woman who, in imitation of you, prays for her children will be blessed.” Just like that, in an instant, I am comforted that the apostles, indeed all of my Son’s believers, know that I am with the Lord, that I will always be close to them, and that now my motherly intercession is even more powerful.
Jesus then gently guides me with his arm, “Come, it is time to escort you to the new Jerusalem where your throne awaits you.” I discern that “time” must have an alternative meaning here for it seems to have no hold on or relevance in this realm. Everything at once is new, and nothing before me is aging. It is as if time and space no longer reign over the human body; rather, because of the victory won by my Son, the human body now reigns over space and time where every moment is eternity.
I am in ecstasy gazing upon my Son once again, and now forever more. His glorified body is perfectly brilliant, and yet he still bears the wounds of his crucifixion, like a lamb that has been slaughtered but remains alive. Jesus, in high priestly garments, girded with a linen ephod woven out of gold, blue, purple, and scarlet threads, begins dancing with all his might before me. I am elevated high above swirling angels and escorted by all those about me, indeed the whole house of this new Israel of God, with shouting, and with the sound of the horn. I turn to find Joseph, who is near my side, smiling. I understand his thoughts perfectly now; in this realm there is no need for him to speak or provide an explanation. Jesus, who has been given the throne of David and who is the true king, is escorting me, the Ark of the Covenant, to his royal city and to the sanctuary within the true Holy of Holies.
In an instant we reach our destination, which is really not a place but rather a state of being. On earth I had Jesus in my body, in my womb where I nourished him for nine months; in heaven, I am in him, in his body, where the Holy Spirit finds his dwelling and the Father his house. Jesus is truly the Temple that encompasses the whole cosmos. And I am the Ark of his Covenant entering into the inner depths of his Sacred Heart, the inner sanctuary of this holy place. I possess awareness that, if I were still on earth, I would have no understanding of this, for my human mind would be utterly helpless in comprehending such a state. But here, my enlightened mind within my glorified body is at home, perfectly content in peace and harmony. Indeed, I have reached the true Sabbath. I am finally complete, taking my place in him, this magnificent Temple.